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Worst Jokes Ever!!!

10M views 27K replies 81 participants last post by  Richard230 
#1 ·
What did the baby light bulb say to his mama? I love you watts and watts.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?"

A fish swims into a concrete wall and says "Dam!!"

Dyslexics of the world untie!!!

I often miss my ex, but my aim is improving

If you're opposed to gay marriage, blame straight couples. They're the ones having all the gay babies.

What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a pitbull? Lipstick.
 
#24,181 ·
Went back to the start of this thread in November of 2013 and found some interesting tidbits. Richard230 was the first to reply. Followed shortly by notacop and RoadPizza. I scolled to page 5 and couldn't find oxytotl. Terry you'll have to figure when you joined the fray.
Has it really been over six years that I have been reading the Worst Jokes Ever every day? [:0] How depressing. :rolleyes:
 
#24,185 ·
Went back to the start of this thread in November of 2013 and found some interesting tidbits. Richard230 was the first to reply. Followed shortly by notacop and RoadPizza. I scrolled to page 5 and couldn't find oxytotl. Terry you'll have to figure when you joined the fray.
I was a late-comer Bill. I got my first F in March 13 but didn't get into posting jokes for about a year. So it'll be 2014. Before that you had the whole world on your shoulders Bill. And your still going strong, power to your elbow mate!! [bow]
 
#24,186 ·
I was a late-comer Bill. I got my first F in March 13 but didn't get into posting jokes for about a year. So it'll be 2014. Before that you had the whole world on your shoulders Bill. And your still going strong, power to your elbow mate!! [bow]
You've more than made up for your late start. I post this one in your honor . . . :)
 

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#24,191 ·
You've more than made up for your late start. I post this one in your honor . . . :)
In your honour (proper English spelling) I've reposted yours and added a couple of my favourites (proper English spelling) - but I love the last one, I'm greedy!!

Mouth Font Thigh Sharing Screenshot
Smile Vision care Sleeve Happy Cool
Clothing Food Jeans Smile Plant

Lip Smile Active tank Muscle Neck
 
#24,193 ·
#24,195 ·
We colonists never learned to spell . . . . :)
According to the Oxford Dictionaries website, this variation is mainly because British English has tended to retain the original spelling of words borrowed from other languages, while American English favors simplified spellings reflecting the way the words are actually pronounced. Others erroneously thought extraneous letters were dropped from certain words in American English because newspapers charged by the letter for advertising. Bill Brysons "Mother Tongue", is a good read which compiles the history and origins of the English language and its various quirks.
 
#24,196 ·
According to the Oxford Dictionaries website, this variation is mainly because British English has tended to retain the original spelling of words borrowed from other languages, while American English favors simplified spellings reflecting the way the words are actually pronounced. Others erroneously thought extraneous letters were dropped from certain words in American English because newspapers charged by the letter for advertising. Bill Brysons "Mother Tongue", is a good read which compiles the history and origins of the English language and its various quirks.
And what do you think of cell phone chat "English"? :rolleyes:
 
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#24,198 ·
And what do you think of cell phone chat "English"? :rolleyes:
"Cell phone", you mean a "mobile"? Ha-ha, we are united in most things but divided by our language. If you do read, and not so many people will pick up a book, Bill Bryson explains how some words evolved including many words taken from native Americans, Inuit, Aboriginal, et al have been incorporated into our modern language and as such are bound to have different spellings and pronounciations. And that's what's so interesting! [lol2][lol2]:whoo:
 
#24,200 ·
"Cell phone", you mean a "mobile"? Ha-ha, we are united in most things but divided by our language. If you do read, and not so many people will pick up a book, Bill Bryson explains how some words evolved including many words taken from native Americans, Inuit, Aboriginal, et al have been incorporated into our modern language and as such are bound to have different spellings and pronounciations. And that's what's so interesting! [lol2][lol2]:whoo:
A few years ago my son got me a "smart" phone for Father's Day. I still haven't figured it out. :-(
 
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